Well, not exactly, but it certainly sounds like one when it’s on the go thanks to a blowing exhaust. Sounds well sick, yeah? Just over a year on from my last post about the Xsara, I’d thought I’d do a long term test report.

It’s French. What’s gone wrong and what has fallen off?

Oh shit off. I’ve never subscribed to the age old nonsense that French cars are a pile of crap as that simply isn’t true. However, a couple of things have gone awry, but that’s more down to age – it’s a 28 year old car, let’s not lose sight of that. It needs a new exhaust as the rear engine mount has decided it no longer wants to be an engine mount and as a result the exhaust has a crack in it. Also, it has a leaking radiator, so a new radiator has been obtained. And in true usual Xsara style, the driver’s side door handle fell off one morning. It’s booked into my local trustworthy garage in a couple of weeks time (at time of writing – obviously) to have all that sorted. I’d do it myself but fuck jacking the car up on a hill and I have very little interest in tinkering with cars in the winter. So it’s all age related wear and tear stuff.

Has it had the breakdown service out?

Have a day off, mate. It’s not a Ford.

Has it failed to start on any occasion?

See above response.

I did notice the battery was getting a bit knackered as the starting was getting laboured, so instead of waiting for it to go flat and leave me stranded, I replaced the battery. Who knew maintenance was a thing? Still, beats parking it in a hedge for 12 months.

What’s it like to live with?

Easy as you like. It’s good to drive, it’s roomy and practical and it’s comfortable. It’s also cheap to run, too. Fuel economy is decent, insurance and tax costs are cheap and if you shop around, parts are cheap.

For example, I’ve managed to source a new radiator for £30 delivered, rear silencer for £40 and centre exhaust for £60, again delivered, the engine mount was less than a tenner, and with postage the door handle was a tenner. Service parts, being a TU engine, are plentiful and cheap from a local motor factors or eBay.

Aside from the exhaust, radiator, engine mount, door handle and battery, the only other thing it needed was a brake pipe for its MoT test. Now, considering this was a sub £1000 28 year old motor, that doesn’t seem at all bad to me, and the car and has racked up 11,000 miles in my ownership.

So, did anything actually go right with it?

Cheeky bloody mare. It’s been damn near faultless since October 2024 when we picked it up. Unfortunately, the few “issues” it has now have all happened at the same time. This year it did another trip to Liverpool and back, went on a road trip in convoy to the Festival of the Unexceptional and many adventures in and around Cornwall. I even found an identical age and spec Xsara not far from Marazion. Here it is, a 1998 1.4i X with my 1998 1.4i X.

It’s a lovely car. It’s endearing, practical, and despite a few wear and age related wobbles, reliable. Is it staying with me? For the foreseeable, definitely. I’ve had a few people stop me and ask about it including a nice chap in Morrisons who once worked at local Citroën dealer Trelawney when the Xsara was current. It also got rear ended in Morrisons, but only a scuff. The shenanigans that go on in Morrisons are worthy of another post. Hoping to take it FOTU again this year, though in classic parking as it was in the concours last year. If I’ve still got it next year, maybe EMwalhalla.

Perhaps this was the trigger. Father’s day present from my son: